I think it's pretty close to impossible to explain how a father loves their child. If you have a child then you probably understand (although that's questionable with some people). For those who don't have children, the idea of a child is impossible to fathom. Even a woman pregnant with her first child, still has no idea what is in store.

It's kind of funny how some people tried to explain to me, the idea of life with a child. Renee and I kept getting these horrible stories told to us about how it would be. "You'll never get any sleep again." "You'll never get to go do the things you want to do." "Life will never be the same for you." All these stories made us wonder why people would ever want to have more than one child, since it's so demanding.

After having a child, I have to say that all of these horror stories are true. You do lose out on sleep. Your life is forever changed. Renee and I can't go out on the town, get irresponsibly drunk. Dane still wakes up at 6:30am, not caring if Mommy and Daddy have a hang over. Yes, all those things are true. I get where they are coming from. BUT, they left out something huge! They left out the absolute total love you feel for your child.

This is the one thing you can't explain to someone without a child. You can add that in (and maybe they did), but all the expecting Mommies and Daddies will hear are the parts about leaving behind their old lives. It's the only thing they can identify with. The love for a child is way too abstract and so foreign for someone who hasn't experienced it.

Last night, just about every 2 hours, I heard Dane stir. He hasn't been feeling good. Teething takes it out of a baby, although most of the time you would never know with Dane. But at night, it's hard for him to get comfortable and the amount of drool (he got that trait from his Daddy for sure) he leaves on his bed, slowly wakes him from a blissful sleep. So when I heard him waking up, I got up (I didn't want Renee to wake up, because she had to get up early), went into his room and ever so gently picked him up and moved him around his crib. He zonked right back out once he was in a dry spot.

This morning Renee went to work at 7:15am (sucks to be her, huh). At 6:30am (or so), she brought a sleepy Dane into our bed after she feed him, so she could shower and get ready. I rolled over and watched him sleep for a little bit while Renee was in the shower. I love watching him sleep. He's so peaceful and relaxed. The love I feel for him is just overwhelming.

The point of all this (sorry if I lost you... sometimes I lose myself) is that there are things you lose when you have a child in your life. Anyone can see that. But once you have a child, those things seem microscopically insignificant when compared to what out get out of it. When you clip a fingernail, you lose a piece of you, but doesn't that seem pretty small compared to the rest of your life?

Maybe I can be more on top of things. You know, keep this current. With all the things going on in my life with a family it's hard to keep this up to date. I'm going to try harder (Haven't I actually said those same words before?).

What's happening? Everything! Dane continues to be the best boy ever! He certainly is the center of the universe in our small family.

A couple of weekends ago, we all went to Dane's first MLB game. Dressed in all the right colors, sporting a ball cap and pacifier, we cruised around the ballpark. He rode in style and comfort in his Snugli. At our seats, we hung out and played, until the first homerun. As the crowd began to roar, my son, who has never heard such a scary sound, began to get the "cry face." I held him close as he whimpered a little and all way okay. After that, the crowd noise didn't bother him. The trip home was pretty short for him, as he slept from the time we put him into the carseat until we arrived at home.

Last week Dane went swimming for the first time. It was at a resort indoor swimming pool and with the other screaming children (mine, of course, not included), it was sensory overload... for me. Dane was fine with the noise. He often looked around to investigate where the annoying noises was coming from, but was pretty unaffected by the shrill screeches.

At first we had him in one of those flotation/swimming suit, but when we put him in the water we realized it was a bit big for him (the floaties floated up and covered his face). So he hung out in Daddy's arms. The water was a little cold ("I can't even stay in... it's FREEZING," Renee says through clattering teeth), but I held him close and he got used to it. He laughed and giggled as he kicked and paddled around. He may not be able to walk, but he knows how to swim (not really swim, but let the proud Daddy have his moment). A couple of times he dropped his head a little for some water... choke... cough... grin! He loved it!

Yesterday was a tough day for everyone. Dane is at daycare 2 days a week with friend of the family. It was my day to drop him off. I handed him off to Anne and he gave the "cry face." I told Anne he was pretty sleepy on the way over and ready for a nap. He held out his arms and just looked at me with his "cry face." I picked him up and held him for a minute. He stopped and I handed him to Anne. The "cry face" returns and I feel like crap. I called Renee and let her know what happened. She called me later and told me he cried himself to sleep. That just breaks my heart! Of course he woke up later and was doing great. No problems. I can understand how people spoil there kids. You never want them to ever have adversity in their lives, but that's the way the world is. You can't protect them from everything and that's the hardest thing to watch. However, I've seen the other side of it. Where parent protected there child from everything, and the child is unable to function in the world because of it.

ANYWAY... You get the gist...